what I want.

This month, another 34 days to my wedding I would like these:

1. A spa package. The whole shebang, massage, facial, lulur etc. I am tired to my core bones and I need this!

2. For the fiancee to at least be in the same wave length with me. I mean, I love him, very much. But its either the dais, or the meja beradab (which is in the package anyway). Not 2 people sitting on top of the stairs eating by themselves. Not my idea of wedding. Maybe his sister said its ok and all, but he is marrying me, not her. Its our wedding after all.

3. To lose weight. Will start rigorously this weekend.

4.To have Hola back soon.

5. To have some money to at least splurge on shoes and new lingerie

That is all for now.

38 days!

I am honestly tired. Extremely excruciatingly tired.

Only 38 days to go to my wedding and I am still like this, blergh.

I want to go for a spa, for my hen's nights, for a weekend vacay. Haigh.

Honestly, to this day, I still regret making this stupid decision. (no, not you my love)

Geez.

pre-wedding anxiety.

I am getting married in less than 2 months and although it may seem like a fairy tale ending for me, I am actually quite sad. Because I can't imagine the thoughts of having to leave my parents' house, for good.

Sometimes I cry in bed thinking how would my life be after this. No. Not that I am scared to face any hardships with him, not that I am ungrateful for the blessings He gave me, the wonderful person He brought in my life, the friends He gave me to brighten up my days. But I just don't know how to explain what I am feeling in words.

When I was 18, I can't wait to get out from the house because well, who doesn't. But now, only few days left, I can't wait to actually be home early and spend more time with them.

Sick. I know.

*sigh*

I am broke but I am cannot admit it to anyone. I have that much pride in me. And I don't want to burden anyone.

I have not paid my car and maybe within 18 days, kena tarik. Heh.

I am currently looking at jobstreet to find a job. A real job.

I need it real soon.

I have so much headache in me. I don't know which one I should prioritize first with so many things going on. The kedai, whether to continue cima this semester or not, the wedding preparations, the loans, debts. Argh.

If only I have the nerve to ask from my parents. If only lah kan.

Will need to minta Hola duit tomorrow to pay the car.

*sigh*

resolutions 2010

Its the 2nd day of 2010. How time flies kan?

Celebrated it with a simple dinner organized by Hola at Havana, Changkat. Amazingly, there were no traffic jams and going there was a breeze.

Close friends were there and that was all I needed.

This year, my resolutions are simple.

To spend more time with le familia, friends and fiancee. To be a better servant to the Him. To make more money. To travel more. To be fitter and exercise more. And lastly, to be a good wife.

InsyaAllah, at 25, I am much more matured and will try to be a better person as a whole.

Pray for me ok.

schedule 101

Yeay tomorrow boyfriend nak balik dah.

Here's the schedule haha:

Friday
12pm - pick him up at the airport
- check him in to the hotel
3pm - singgah Sambal sambal
6pm - ciao to have dinner
10pm - balik rumah

Saturday
10am - bangun
11am - siap go Razak's wedding at Shah Alam
2pm - go Rasta & Hartamas for the flea market with Hola Bola and le fiancee
(no plans in between)
8pm - dinner at HRC
11pm - lepak with le fiancee and friends

Sunday
10am - bangun
12pm - go to another wedding at Tabung Haji KJ
2pm - hantar le fiancee to his family's house

ok dah set dah.
can't wait for tomorrow!

recaps 2009

Ok, I am just bored right now.

Only 30 days to a new year. Time just whiz by in a flash kan?

I want to write about what I did this year but there just so many, so I'll write it by segments ok.

Travels

1. Hong Kong - went to Hong Kong for the annual family getaway in January. I went there once with Sue and Zam and being my second time, I was appointed as the unofficial travel guide. The last time I went there, it was KL-Macau-Hong Kong-Macau-KL because we took Air Asia and at that time there were no direct flight from KL to HK. This year it was KL-HK-Shenzen-HK-KL. Although the 2nd time there, there's still so much to enjoy and explore and I had loads of fun!

2. Bandung - went to Bandung with Ma in February (I think!) as at first it was supposed to be Sue and I yearly's getaway but she had to go to UK and so I was left with no one. Luckily mom offered to replace her. She paid for her own tickets but because my ticket was an economy promo ticket, I had to purchase a new one.

In Bandung was when I told her about my engagement plan. She went crazy and bought tonnes of laces there. We went to the spa and spent a whole day there, went shopping, and there's this one time I really wanted to try the street food of Bandung and persuaded her to accompany me and it was so sweet of her to oblige! (she's a hygiene freak on food and would rather pee in her pants rather than pee in a dirty toilet! you get what I mean. haha) As I wanted to save cost (since she's not even paying for my hotel), we rode the angkutan to and fro the shopping and spa areas. Comel gila. Should have taken a picture of us! in one of those thing!

3. Singapore - Went to Singapore to meet the bf in January (I think!), since he was working there at that time. Spent a night there and that trip made me realize how far I would go for him and how much I love him.

4. Perhentian - Went there with le bf in June with J*ohn and M*el. It was super fun!

We actually canoed from an island to another island. I couldn't bear to be in the canoe any longer because I was tired and it was scorching hot I basically jumped out from the canoe from like 100 metres away from the shore! It was super tiring but it was the ultimate fun.

Academic

1. I am currently taking CIMA (Chartered Institute of Management Accounting) in a hope for a better future. Classes started on July and I went for most of them, although it was freaking far. Sat for the exams last 29th and hope that I could pass at least one of the papers. (CIMA Malaysia has only 23% passing rates!)

Financial

1. Bought a car. Regretted it, since dad has one extra car unused. But I am glad I have something to my name.

2. Bought a baby, with my best friend of 9 years. Emptied my savings. Its really like a baby, you know, the love hate relationship you would have with your own baby haaa like that lah! The business has been in the reds for the past 6 months but its getting a bit better nowadays. Luckily I have the bf for financial support and I owe him my life for all he did for me. Seriously. Without him, I don't know what would happen. I hope it would make some money and may it be successful.

Relationships

1. I got engaged last August to someone awesome. After all the years of searching (well, not literally lah) I have finally found my soul mate. Someone that could accept me for the way I am. I love him to death.

2. Lost few friends (3 of them, actually!) because of some stupid stupid misunderstanding. Well, friends like that, they would just come and go. I need to bear in mind to be nicer to my existing friends.

Hm.

I think that's just about what happened this year in my life. I will update if anything crosses my mind lagi.