Pls come home.

My cat may be lost or dead and for a week I've been keeping my hopes high because my other cat found her way back home after a week missing.
Now it has been almost 2 weeks and Jack is still not home yet.

It hasn't sunk in to me that he may be dead because I know he's a naughty cat, probably wandering around looking for a new mate but a part of me kind of knew he wouldn't be coming home.

He was a birthday gift from dad on my 18th. A gift, adding joy to our family, amusing us with his antiques, making us mad with his place marking - he peed everywhere!, bringing smiles to us everyday. He was such a gentleman, saying hi to every new faces he met. Constantly seeking for attention, wanting to be stroked and pet. Such an intuitive boy, fell down twice and broke 2 of his legs and oh boy, how we had to nurse him back to health.

I'm worried he's not eating well because of all the 7 years, he has never been away from home this long and he doesn't know how to eat food other than his. He doesn't like rain and he's scared of thunder.

I miss his wet nose, his constant seeking for attention, the scratching he does whenever we close our bedroom door, looking at him lying on his back, teasing him with ropes, scaring him with the vacuum cleaner, feeding him and yeah even cleaning his poop.
I miss him so much.

He is much a part of the family than anyone would ever be.

So pls God, I don't ask much from you, just pls, if he's dead, I hope you let him die in dignity. If he's lost, pls lead him back home safely.


Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

Envy

As much as I want to get rid of the feeling envy whenever someone is much better in terms of almost everything than I am, I could not. I should be happy for them but I could not.
I am not perfect, no one is. But why do I see people around me more fortunate than I am? More smarter, richer, prettier, luckier. With great hair, great job, great body, great handbag?

I know I should be thankful for everything I have and really, I am thankful for He has blessed me with more than I deserved but gees, this feeling is disturbing. Am I just this sick? Or does other people feel envy towards people around them as well?

Guess I'll never find out.


Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

life as it is.

Hi blogblog.

Husband sekarang pergi jumpa kawannya. Aku suka bila dia pergi bersosial. Bukan sebab aku tak suka tengok muka dia 24/7 tapi aku suka bila dia dapat balance-kan hidupnya. Bukan untuk aku je. Kawan-kawan penting. Tak logik untuk duduk berdua saja dan rasa tak kena. Eventhough aku paksa-paksa, pujuk dia untuk keluar, aku tersedar yang aku sendiri jarang keluar. Bila kawan mengajak keluar, aku malas. Bila aku terasa nak keluar, mereka pula yang sibuk. Tapi takpe, weekend ni aku ada 2 social events yang aku nantikan. Honestly, I miss my friends. Cumanya, aku memang pemalas.

Adik aku fail lagi satu-satunya paper yang membolehkannya bergelar CPL holder. Untuk kali ke 3. Dia sedih seharian. Aku faham perasaannya. Banyak kali jugak aku fail paper(s). Dia tak nak bagitahu ayah aku, takut di marah katanya - dah 3 kali ayah aku diberitahu. Aku faham juga. Aku pun tak bagitahu mereka - parents masa aku fail paper dulu tapi sekarang when I turn back, I wished I had told them. Memang mereka akan marah, but we deserve it kan? Sebab takut mereka marah tu lah kita akan cuba tak buat lagi. Kan?
Tapi semalam, sebab kesiankan muka adik aku, aku biarkan dia sembunyikan rahsianya buat kali terakhir. If he fails again, saya akan jadi tukang report! :)

Oh, last week duit banyak dihabiskan on pregnancy test kit. Lepas bulan puasa hari tu, period aku tak keluar-keluar. Memang badan aku pelik, bila stress, memang akan sampai 3-4 bulan period aku akan jadi haywire. Tapi setahu aku, semenjak sambal sambal dijual, hidup aku kurang stress hence sepatutunya period aku jadi stabil. Jadi aku ingatkan aku mengandung. Kesemua 5-6 stick mengatakan negative. Heh.
Sudahnya on the day that I bought 2 sticks at one go - just in case, malam tu lah juga period aku keluar.
Aku lega, sebab sejujurnya financially, socially and emotionally aku belum sedia. Tapi aku kecewa, sebab well, who doesn't want to have a baby. Dan sebenarnya aku cemburu tengok semua orang yang kahwin selepas aku kahwin, dah pun mengandung.
*Conclusion: how do we know we are ready for a baby? we will never know! its a gift, a surprise, so insyaAllah, if one day it comes, I'll be the happiest.

Pasal berhenti kerja pula. Aku penat diadili. Macam kerja yang aku buat tak langsung dihargai.
Jadi senang, aku berhenti. 15 days later, aku dapat kerja baru. Permanent. Better perks, better environment, better people. Yang paling best, aku tak perlu bayar untuk hospital masa nak beranak nanti. :)
Dan aku tersedar, memang perjalanan karier aku untuk tahun-tahun akan datang is in FMCG. Alhamdulillah.

Aku nak kena belajar. 2 paper in 14 days.
Oh, aku ada impian baru. Biar aku lepaskan kedua-dua kertas ni nanti aku cerita.

From Johor Bahru with Love

Hye kak long! I mis u!

Ingt x mase kecik2 kte maen super mario atas tembok rumah taman suria? Ngahaha. Random.

Lovs!
Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

monday.

Hi blog blog,
I miss writing to you. But there's just so many things happening. :(
Oh, I quit my job. Got a new one.
Exam is in less than 15 days.
I wanna poop.

Later.